


Halloween Among the Muggles

by burglebezzlement



Category: Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Costumes, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Extra Treat, Friendship, Gen, Halloween, Trick or Treat: Chocolate Box, Trick or Treating, Witches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-23 05:44:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12500116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/burglebezzlement/pseuds/burglebezzlement
Summary: Rebecca’s Southern California Halloween has all the normal things. Like spending time with her roommate Heather, handing out candy to trick or treaters, and being a completely normal Muggle who totally isn’t hiding a past life as a witch.





	Halloween Among the Muggles

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mierke](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mierke/gifts).



Rebecca gives in and uses a Sticking Charm to affix the row of charmed paper bats to the wall. She whispers another charm, and the bats begin fluttering gently, like there’s a breeze behind them.

She steps back to admire the effect. Totally spooky, completely Halloween, and nothing a Muggle couldn’t achieve with a wind machine. Perfect. 

Rebecca doesn’t take her wand out much these days. Too much trouble with the Wizarding authorities — too many incidents. Even without a wand, Rebecca’s temper sometimes gets the better of her, and she doesn’t want to end up in Wizarding prison. Not again. Not after what happened that time with Robert and the pig’s tail.

She’s one of the Muggles now. Sure, sometimes a witch or wizard might seek out Whitefeather & Associates for specialized legal advice about Wizarding property laws, or her mother might try to set her up with some wizard who’s moving to LA. But Rebecca’s living her life as a Muggle. Just like Josh.

A Muggle who makes an exception for Halloween.

“This looks good,” Heather says, coming into the room. She’s wearing a set of cat ears, although Rebecca isn’t sure if they’re meant ironically or not. “Like, really good. Are you super-into Halloween or something?”

“I never got to celebrate it in New York.” Rebecca twirls around to let Heather admire the way her witch’s skirt flares out. “I was always working late. But we have a house now! Trick or treaters!” She can’t wait.

Heather grabs a handful of mini-Snickers from the bowl by the door and flops down on the couch. “You didn’t get to go trick or treating when you were a kid?”

“I went to school in England.” Rebecca pauses. “Well, not really England. Scotland.” She waits for Heather to get it — _Hogwarts_ — but Heather just shrugs. 

“Sounds nice,” she says. 

If Rebecca wasn’t sure her roommate was 100% Muggle before, that sorted it. Dropping the Hogwarts-bomb in front of another witch or wizard is exactly the same as dropping the Harvard-bomb in a group of investment bankers. Rebecca would know: she’s done both. 

“Yeah,” Rebecca says. “They did Halloween right. Every year the groundskeeper would bring in hundreds of pumpkins, and all the teachers dressed up, and the elves made amazing candy —” She breaks off, but Heather doesn’t seem to have noticed that she said elves.

“That sounds nice.” Heather unwraps another Snickers. “Hey, I think the trick or treaters are avoiding us.”

“Really?” Rebecca rushes to the window. While she watches, two small clusters of costumed children walk down the sidewalk past their house, to the walkway down to the Donovans.

The _Donovans_. Rebecca happens to know that they’re handing out Tootsie Rolls. 

“Why are they avoiding us?” she asks. “I thought I made the decorations fun-creepy, not scary-creepy! And aren’t kids desensitized by violence and gore anyway these days?”

“Your decorations are great,” Heather says. “I think it’s the whole murder-house thing.”

“But we have candy.”

“Guess now we get to eat it all.” Heather shrugs.

“No. No, this isn’t fair. I was finally getting to live like a normal —” Rebecca breaks off before she can say Muggle. “Like a normal person. And what’s more normal than giving out candy to kids?”

“Giving out candy to kids is pretty much only normal on Halloween or if you live in a white panel van,” Heather says, but Rebecca’s not listening.

She rubs her fingers along her wand. She can feel the potential there. The power, hidden inside thirteen inches of hawthorne, phoenix feather core, swishy.

She could bewitch them all. One Obliviate, properly cast, and she can wipe away any memory the trick-or-treaters have of the murders at this house. Just one charm. Not even an Unforgivable.

 _No._ She’s living her life as a Muggle now. She doesn’t do that. 

Not anymore. 

She can solve her problems the way Muggles do.

“Bribery,” she says. She whispers an engorging charm to another package of fun-size Snickers. It bursts open, the full-size candy bars scattering on the floor. “Go give them candy, and tell them to tell their friends.”

“You got it.” Heather breaks open one of the candy bars for herself, and then scoops the rest into one of Rebecca’s Halloween-themed bowls, the one with the fake hand hidden in the bottom.

They start getting trick or treaters a few minutes later, brought by the lure of candy cast out over West Covina’s social networks. Rebecca has to cast several more engorging charms and a dividing charm to keep up with the candy demand, but it’s worth it. They’re the most popular house on the block.

Rebecca hands a giant Reese cup to a little girl dressed like the princess from Slumbered, and smiles. She didn’t need her magic to do this.

She’s finally fitting in here in West Covina.


End file.
